Superb Sayings

If the Road is Beautiful then, Worry About the Destination, But if the Destination is Beautiful, Then Don't Worry About The Road!

We Always Feel that GOD Never comes on Time When We Call Him...But the Truth is ~ "He is Always on Time" But "We are Always in Hurry!

Trust the One Who can See, These Three Thing in You ~Sorrow Behind Your SMILE, Love Behind Your ANGER & Reason Behind Your SILENCE!

Beautiful things Are not Always Good ~ But Good things are Always Beautiful!

Never Miss the First Opportunity, Because the Second Opportunity Will be Much More Difficult than First!

Dreams Aren't those That You Have when You are Asleep, Dreams are Those that Don't Let You Sleep till They are Fulfilled!

Its Purity of Heart that Matters, Not the External Appearance. Because Helping Hands are Always,Better than Praying Lips…!

No one could actually say that you deserve better. Because the best thing that you deserve, will always be your choice.

When your Time is Good, Your Mistakes are taken As a Joke! But When Your Time is Bad, Even your Jokes are Noticed as Mistakes!

We Judge Ourselves By what We Feel we're Capable of Doing, While Others Judge us By what We have Already Done!

LAUGH like You have Never Cried, PLAY like You have Never Lost, LOVE like You have Never Hurt And LIVE like There is No Tomorrow!

Two Things that Define SUCCESS In LIFE: - The Way You Manage when You Have Nothing & Way You Behave when You Have Everything!

Don't concentrate on what Someone Else can Do that you Cannot Concentrate on What You can Do That Others Cannot.

Never Be too Proud of who You are & What Position you Hold Because After a Game of Chess The King & The Puns are tossed Into The Same Box!

शक्की पति

शक्की पति, पहले दिन.....

पति (फोन पर): कहां हो ?

पत्नी : घर में।

पति : अच्छा यदि घर में हो तो मिक्सी चलाओ।

पत्नी मिक्सी चलाती है.....

घर्र...घर्र..घर्र..घर्र

पति : अच्छा ठीक है।

दूसरे दिन.....

पति (फोन पर): कहां हो ?

पत्नी : घर में।

पति : अच्छा यदि घर में हो तो मिक्सी चलाओ।

पत्नी मिक्सी चलाती है... घर्र...घर्र..घर्र..घर्र

पति : अच्छा ठीक है।

तीसरे दिन पति अचानक घर पहुंच जाता है......

पति : मालकिन कहां है ?नौकर : पता नहीं साहब,बहुत देर से कहीं गई हैं .....

लेकिन साहब....... एक बात समझ नहीं आयी साथ में झोले में रखकर मिक्सी क्यों ले गई हैं। .......

MurgeWala

LADY murge wale se: Koi achchha murga dikhao 

.

.

Murge wale ne Murga dikhaya

LADY (Uske niche haath laga k): Ye haidrabad ka hai. Koi aur dikhao 

.

.

2nd murge k b niche haath laga k:

Ye to punjab ka hai !

.

.

3rd murge k b niche haath laga k:

Yes, ye gujrat ka hai. De do.

.

.

Paise dene k baad Lady: Tum kahan k ho ?

.

.

MURGEWALA (Sharmate hue): Ab main kya batau. Aap khud hi check kar lo !

Presentation does matter...

Two Women chatting in office.

Woman 1: I had a fine evening, how was yours?

Woman 2: It was a disaster.. My husband came home, ate his dinner in 3 minutes and fell a sleep. How was yours ?

Woman 1: Oh it was amazing! My husband came home and took me out for a romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour.. When we came home he lit the candles around the house. It was like a fairy tale!

At the same time, their husbands are talking at work.

Husband 1: How was your evening ?

Husband 2: Great... I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate and fell asleep. What about you ?

Husband 1: It was horrible. I came home, there's no dinner, they cut the electricity because I forgot to pay the bill; so I took her out for dinner which was so expensive that i didn't had money left for a cab. We walked home which took an hour and when we got home I remembered there was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house!!

Moral: Presentation does matter...  matter what the reality is.

Deal

A Man Gifted his Wife a Diamond Necklace for their Anniversary 

and Wife didn't Speak to him for 6 Months.

Was the Necklace FAKE?

- No That was the Deal

Outstanding

Beggar - Give me food.

Man - I'll give u vodka.

Beggar - i dont drink.

Man - i will give u ciggarete

Beggar - i dont smoke.

Man - i will take u to d races.

Beggar - i dont gamble.

Man - i will get u a girlfriend.

Beggar - no i only love my wife.

Man - i'll give u food, but first u have to come to my house.

Beggar - why? 

Man - i want  my wife to see what state people get into when they don't drink, smoke, gamble and only love their wife...

Sardarji's Mom's Letter

Dear Banta

Vahe  Guru !

 

I am in a well here and hoping you are in the same well there. I'm  writing this letter slowly, because I know you  cannot read fast. 

 

We  don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in  the newspaper  that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved  20 miles. 

 

I wont be able to send the address as the last Sardar who  stayed here  took the house numbers with them for their new house so they would not have  to change their address. Hopefully by next week we will be able  to bring  our earlier address plate here, so that our address will remain  same too. 

 

This  place is really nice. It even has a washing machine, situated  right above  the commode. I'm not sure how it works. Last week I put in 3  shirts, pulled  the chain and haven't seen them since. 

 

The  weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The  first time  it rained for 3 days and second time for 4 days. 

 

The  coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little  too heavy  to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off  and put  them in the pocket. 

 

Your  father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting  the grass  at the cemetery. 

 

By  the way I took Bahu to our club's poolside. The manager is  really badmash.  He told her that two-piece swimming suit is not allowed in  this club.  We were confused as to which piece should we remove? 

 

Your  sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it is  a girl  or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or  Uncle. 

 

Your  uncle, Jetinder fell in a nearby well. Some men tried to pull him  out, but  he fought them off bravely and drowned. We cremated him and he  burned for  three days. 

 

Your  best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He died trying to fulfill  his father's  last wishes. His father had wished to be buried at sea after  he died.  And your friend died while in the process of digging a grave for  his father. 

 

There  isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has  happened. 

 

P.S:  Beta, I was going to send you some money but by the time I realized,  I had  already sealed off this letter.

Happy Janamastmi

😘😘

Yashomati Mom Se

Talking Nandlala,

Radha Q Fair,

I m Q Kala,

Boli Smiling Maiya:

Listen mere lala,

....Wo City Ki item

Tu Village Ka Gwala

Thats why U Kala...

Happy gokulashthami in advance

latest Meaning

* * Cyclone* *

Bank manager asks Sardar in an interview: "What is cyclone"

Sardar: "It is the loan given to purchase a cycle"

 

* * Side Effects* *

Once Sardar brought some tablets and started cutting the edges. Do you know why?

He wanted to avoid side effects! 

 

* *Advice* *

A famous Sardar's declaration to the media: "I will never marry in my

life. And I will advise the same to my children too"

 

* * Oxygen*

Teacher: Oxygen is very essential to life. It was discovered in 1773

Sardar: Thank God!! I was born after 1773. Had I born earlier, I would have died...

 

* * Skeleton* *

Interviewer: What is a skeleton?

Sardar: Sir, skeleton is a person who started dieting, but forgot to stop it! 

Shraad

✈✈✈✈✈✈

👸shaily (Air hostess) to Pandit: Sir, kya lenge?

👴Pandit- Puri, sabji, khir aur laddu.

👸Air hostess- Sir, aap kingfisher k plane me baithe hai,

     Vijay malya k shraadh me nahi...

Jungle-lion

Two lions escape from a zoo. One of the lions had been captured from the jungle, so he runs back to the jungle. The other was born in the zoo itself - so is basically a city-slicker. He vanishes into the city. 

Three days later the jungle-lion is recaptured - and returned to the zoo. A month passes, then two, three..... but city-lion is not traceable! Finally, after six months later the city-lion is also recaptured and brought back to the zoo. 

Jungle-lion is amazed to see his friend. Jungle-lion: For God's sake, how were you able to evade these guys for 6 whole months?!

City-lion: Kuchh nahi yaar! I just went to a government department, and hid behind a huge pile of dusty files that they have there.

 Jungle-lion: But what did you eat there? 

City-lion: Arrey, there was an unlimited supply of govt servants. Whenever I ate one, they hired five more. Nobody did any work anyway, so nobody missed the ones I ate.

 Jungle-lion: Wow! But, then how did you get caught? 

City-lion: Galti kar gaya yaar... One day I ate the chai-walla. The whole office stopped working. They launched a massive hunt fr the Chaiwala. And I got caught!

facebook status

A Girl's facebook status:-"Travelled in Bus after long time"

 Comments Left by Male friends :-

 1) Awww, so sweet..!!!

 2) May be nextime will go together sweetie...!!!

 3) Wow, i want to experience it..!!!

 4) You went without me..?:(

 5) Wonderful dear..!!!

6) Superlike!!!

 A Boy's facebook status:- "Travelled in Bus after a long time.."

 Comments Left by same Male friends :-

 1) Haan toh saale hum kya kare..?

 2) Bas yehi teri aukat hai.!!

 3) Kamine ab auto mai bhi jaiga toh status update karega kya..??

 4) Baap ko bol kam se kam cycle lekar de..!!!

 5) Usi bus ka conductor ban ja kutte.

 6) Ticket kharida ki nahi Bhikhari ?

Joke of the day

A Sardarji was caught by police...

Police: How did you kill 20 people?

Sardarji : Main gaadi tez chala raha tha par jab maine brake lagaya, toh pata laga ki brake fail ho gaya hain...

Phir main ne samne dekha toh ek taraf 2 aadmi ja rahe the aur dusri taraf 1 barat ja rahi thi...

Ab tum batao main gaadi kidhar modta?

Police: Of course, jis taraf 2 admi the...

Nuksaan kam hota...

Sardarji : Exactly.............................................................

Maine bhi yahi socha tha par woh 2 aadmi meri gaadi dekh kar barat me ghus gaye...!!!

Hindi Songs & their Medical Meanings

 Jiya Jale Jaan Jale, Raat Bhar Dhuan Chale – Fever

Tadap Tadap Ke Is Dil Se Aah Nikalti Rahi – Heart Attack

Suhani Raat Dhal Chuki, Na Jaane Tum Kab Aoge – Constipation

Bidi Jalayle Jigar Se Piya Jigar Ma Badi Aag Hai – Acidity

Tujh Mein Rab Dikhta Hai, Yaara Main Kya Karoon – Cataract

Tuje Yaad Na Meri Aayi Kisi Se Ab Kya Kehna – Alzheimer’s

Mann Dole Mera Tann Dole – Vertigo

Tip-Tip Barsa Pani, Pani Ne Aag Lagayi – Urinary Infection

Dil Dhadak-Dhadak Ke Keh Raha Hai –Hypertension

Aaj Kal Paaon Zameen Par Nahi Padte Mere – Corn On Feet

Haay-Re-Haay Neend Nahi Aaye –Insomnia

Batana Bhi Nahi Aata, Chupana Bhi Nahi Aata – Piles

And Sabse Mast

Lagi Aaj Saawan Ki Phir Wo Zadi Hai –Loose Motion

Daughters are always so special !!

On the first day of their marriage, wife and husband decided and agreed not to open the door for anyone! On that day first, husband’s parents came to see them, they were behind the door. Husband and the wife looked at each other, husband wanted to open the door, but since they had an agreement he did not open the door, so his parents left. After a while the same day , wife’s parents came , wife and the husband looked at each other and even though they had an agreement , wife with tears on her eyes whispered , I can’t do this to my parents , and she opened the door. Husband did not say anything, years passed and they had 4 boys and the fifth child was a girl. The father, planned a very big party for the new born baby girl, and he invited everyone over. Later that night his wife asked him what was the reason for such a big celebration for this baby while we did not do it for the others! The Husband simply replied, because she is the one who will open the door for me!

Daughters are always so special !!

WHAT A WONDERFUL WAY TO EXPLAIN IT .

   

A sick man turned to his doctor as he was preparing to Leave the examination room and said,
Doctor, I am afraid to die.
Tell me what lies on the other side.'
Very quietly, the doctor said, 'I don't know.'
'You don't know what's on the other side?'
The doctor was holding the handle of the door; On the other side came a sound of scratching and whining, And as he opened the door, a dog sprang into the room And leaped on him with an eager show of gladness.
Turning to the patient, the doctor said, 'Did you notice my dog?
He's never been in this room before.
He didn't know what was inside.
He knew nothing except that his master was here, And when the door opened, he sprang in without fear.
I know little of what is on the other side of death, But I do know one thing...
I know my Master is there and that is enough.

https://rishtey-natey.blogspot.in/

Natural Therapy For Headaches!

In about 5 mins, your headache will go....... :)

The nose has a left and a right side. 

We use both to inhale and exhale. 

Actually they are different. 

You'll be able to feel the difference. 

The right side represents the sun. 

The left side represents the moon. 

During a headache, try to close your right nose 

and use your left nose to breathe. 

In about 5 mins, your headache will go. 

If you feel tired, just reverse, close your left nose 

and breathe through your right nose. 

After a while, you will feel your mind is refreshed. 

Right side belongs to 'hot', so it gets heated up easily. 

Left side belongs to 'cold'. 

Most females breathe with their left noses, 

so they get "cooled off" faster. 

Most of the guys breathe with their right noses,

they get worked up.

Do you notice, the moment you awake, which side breathes better? 

Left or right ? 

If left is better, you will feel tired. 

So, close your left nose and use your right nose for breathing.. 

You will feel refreshed quickly. 

Do you suffer from continual headaches? 

Try out this breathing therapy. 

Close your right nose and breathe through your left nose. 

Your headaches will be gone. 

Continued the exercise for one month. 

 

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